June 28, 1999

CKL's HotSheet *

What Non-Aardvarks are Pondering This Week...

by Curtis C. Chen
 

01 DIVX is dead. Long live DVD!

02 Homicide: Life on the Street is not quite dead yet. Long live HLOTS!

03 Michael Jackson. And the Oscar goes to... the King of Pop, who paid a paltry $1.5 million for David O. Selznick's Gone with the Wind statuette. Now why didn't Harvey Weinstein think of that?

04 The Phantom Menace, as deconstructed by David Brin, just doesn't seem quite so kid-friendly anymore. Maybe you should take them to see that South Park cartoon instead.

05 Saint Isidore is among the front-runners to be the patron saint of the Internet. Okay, but will he have his own action figure?

06 The Red Dwarf is not the movie version of the popular Britcom. Also, please do not confuse its titular star with the Rimmer munchkins from "Blue".

07 The Editing Room: Abridged Scripts for Movies self-aggrandizes thusly: "No time to see the latest hollywood blockbuster? Want to know what to expect before you see a movie? Want to read a mockery of some movie you hated? Have a few minutes to kill?"

08 The CIA sculpture cryptogram has still not been solved, though one man has gotten closer. More padding for his private sector résumé.

09 George Lucas is taking his special effects business elsewhere. POP QUIZ: what's the Phantom connection between George Lucas, Paul Weitz, Chris Weitz, and "Weird Al" Yankovic? E-mail me with the answer and win a prize!

10 www.dumbentia.com celebrates all the idiocy that's fit to be parodied in this modern world. For example...

11 The Jack T. Chick Parody Archives. If you don't recognize that name, you'd better just see for yourself.

12 "The Factoid project sits in the context of this long-term goal: Remember every piece of information a person encounters during his entire life." And that, folks, is the winner of our "Understatement of the Week" award.

13 DISHPlayer, a.k.a. Echostar Model 7100, a.k.a. WebTV Plus Service for Satellite, is pretty damn cool. But it's only hardware...

14 The Alien Legacy, my first DVD box set, kicks xenomorph ass for software. And software, as we all know, is where it's at. ("I just want to say one word to you...just one word... Are you listening? ...Content.")

15 July 4th brings to mind many things, including this one from the archives: an important 1996 computer virus alert!